More of Captain Douchebag

Peter King wrote this week, in response to an even bigger douchebag that "The real American dream. John F. Kennedy, Barack Obama, Pat Tillman." I have no qualms with Obama or Tillman, but how is JFK the "real American dream"? He was born into an extremely wealthy family and his father essentially bought him the Presidency. Don't get me wrong, I really like JFK, but he is not the American dream. The American Dream is when one overcomes times of hardships to make a success out of oneself. JFK never had to overcome a single real hardship. (He had Addison's Disease, but his father got him the best medical treatment and drugs in the world.) So Peter, when you decide to be Captain Douchebag and critique another media douchebag, at least get your examples right.

Fuck you, CBS

Really, fuck you CBS. Instead of taking me to the Texans-Titans game, I had to watch the "fabulous four" yammer on about that day's highlights. Fucktards. I could watch ESPN to get highlights. I could go online, or even read the newspaper the next day. You know what I couldn't do? What the game live. And you know what I missed? Vince Young's 39-yard TD run. So really CBS: Fuck you.

Peter King: Douchebag

Hey, this latte-drinking douchebag thinks that Shawne Merriman should be considered for NFL Defensive Player of the Year:

"Looks to me like, even with the quarter-season missed with the steroid ban, Merriman and Julius Peppers will duel for the NFL's defensive player of the year award. "

Hey, Peter, are you aware that Merriman's stats are juiced up by those steroids? That Mr. Merriman cheated? No? Well, I think it may be time to lay off those lattes. Or green tea. Whatever sissy-beverage you drink these days.

Andrew Jackson: Badass

A few words on this blog's title...

Hopefully, people know Andrew Jackson was the seventh President. However, they probably don't... it's more likely they know him as the guy on the twenty-dollar bill. Pathetic. Though one wouldn't know it from the bill, Andrew Jackson was a total badass. He sort of looks like a pansy on that bill, but that's a misrepresentation. This man dueled and was even shot twice! Once he got shot in the shoulder, grimaced, then killed the guy. Sweet. As President, furthermore, a man attempted to assassinate him. He had two guns, both of which failed to work. Jackson beat him up with his cane. Andrew Jackson was a badass with a liking for duels and, by being his second, I'm half the immense badass that Jackson was.